Oasis 2K8 is finally over.
For most of us it was a rollercoaster ride. For some it was more.
For most of us it was about 96 hours of non-stop fun, endless gyrations to live shows of KK, Euphoria and a lesser-known-but-far-better Lounge Piranha, gorging on food....Dominos, CCD, Delhi Chhat, ah! whatever....the dance workshops which could definitely get awkward at times, the night-outs doing nothing or perhaps watching the Delhi chics with their plastic legs and plastic smiles....the events, the work, the fun, the winning ,the losing.....
But for me it was more. Much much more.
And now everything is empty. Everyone's off for Diwali, while i sit here ascetic-like pondering on the time went by. Have to get my act together now and move on....till we meet again....
Oasis 2K9.
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Monday, October 20, 2008
Reject, Regret, Reborn
There is great power in rejection. Note that. Read on.
Its not often that I have been rejected in my life, infact I can say without boasting that I've been eagerly accepted by people in all walks of life. But a string of rejections in the past has got me thinking if I have been walking straight all this time. And boy, I have been pondering over this for a long long time...
And it all culminated on the 18th of October as I walked out of the room of 5 odd Deans after a "healthy 20 minute session". I saw disapproval in their eyes. and no thats not it. The funny part was that I approved their disapproval.
What have I got to in the past couple of years..... from someone who was accustomed to succeed, I've begun approving of people when they tell me that I cannot make it. I have embraced mediocrity, waiting and thinking each day that the next day is going to be the last day of the drought, then embracing mediocrity all over again at nightfall.
You do not wait for the results to be out. You ask yourself if you are worth it. And when the answer does not surprise you, you realize that this is your last chance to change. In reply to his "What have you been upto?" I told my friend Sahil once, "I've been thinking." . Dear friend, I'm finally done with it.
Recently read that a group of quacks claim to have found the Sanjeevni Herb. Don't know about them but I sure have one in my mind right now. And as I skip out of this room, I promise to never return for another post again. I give the sole responsibility of this blog to Varun Pandey. Met him a long time ago. Reminds me of what my past was a long long time ago, and what my future will be from the very next moment.
No one likes a complainer, or someone who keeps brooding about his troubles and transferring them over to his readers( i flatter myself). No one likes Mr. all-talk-no-work. So I'll be gone.
But its hard not to succeed when you know so much. When you have thought out so much at such a young age. It has its perils, but when you come out of it, its a whole new world out there.
Vineet was right when he said , "Irrespective of what you put it down to, it's there: that's the only verifiable fact. You either come out strong or you don't come out at all."
To all the time I spent.
Cheers
Varun Pandey
Its not often that I have been rejected in my life, infact I can say without boasting that I've been eagerly accepted by people in all walks of life. But a string of rejections in the past has got me thinking if I have been walking straight all this time. And boy, I have been pondering over this for a long long time...
And it all culminated on the 18th of October as I walked out of the room of 5 odd Deans after a "healthy 20 minute session". I saw disapproval in their eyes. and no thats not it. The funny part was that I approved their disapproval.
What have I got to in the past couple of years..... from someone who was accustomed to succeed, I've begun approving of people when they tell me that I cannot make it. I have embraced mediocrity, waiting and thinking each day that the next day is going to be the last day of the drought, then embracing mediocrity all over again at nightfall.
You do not wait for the results to be out. You ask yourself if you are worth it. And when the answer does not surprise you, you realize that this is your last chance to change. In reply to his "What have you been upto?" I told my friend Sahil once, "I've been thinking." . Dear friend, I'm finally done with it.
Recently read that a group of quacks claim to have found the Sanjeevni Herb. Don't know about them but I sure have one in my mind right now. And as I skip out of this room, I promise to never return for another post again. I give the sole responsibility of this blog to Varun Pandey. Met him a long time ago. Reminds me of what my past was a long long time ago, and what my future will be from the very next moment.
No one likes a complainer, or someone who keeps brooding about his troubles and transferring them over to his readers( i flatter myself). No one likes Mr. all-talk-no-work. So I'll be gone.
But its hard not to succeed when you know so much. When you have thought out so much at such a young age. It has its perils, but when you come out of it, its a whole new world out there.
Vineet was right when he said , "Irrespective of what you put it down to, it's there: that's the only verifiable fact. You either come out strong or you don't come out at all."
To all the time I spent.
Cheers
Varun Pandey
The Suicide Note of Kurt Donald Cobain, 1967-1994
To Boddah
Speaking from the tongue of an experienced simpleton who obviously would rather be an emasculated, infantile complain-ee. This note should be pretty easy to understand.
All the warnings from the punk rock 101 courses over the years, since my first introduction to the, shall we say, ethics involved with independence and the embracement of your community has proven to be very true. I haven't felt the excitement of listening to as well as creating music along with reading and writing for too many years now. I feel guity beyond words about these things.
For example when we're back stage and the lights go out and the manic roar of the crowds begins., it doesn't affect me the way in which it did for Freddie Mercury, who seemed to love, relish in the the love and adoration from the crowd which is something I totally admire and envy. The fact is, I can't fool you, any one of you. It simply isn't fair to you or me. The worst crime I can think of would be to rip people off by faking it and pretending as if I'm having 100% fun. Sometimes I feel as if I should have a punch-in time clock before I walk out on stage. I've tried everything within my power to appreciate it (and I do,God, believe me I do, but it's not enough). I appreciate the fact that I and we have affected and entertained a lot of people. It must be one of those narcissists who only appreciate things when they're gone. I'm too sensitive. I need to be slightly numb in order to regain the enthusiasms I once had as a child.
On our last 3 tours, I've had a much better appreciation for all the people I've known personally, and as fans of our music, but I still can't get over the frustration, the guilt and empathy I have for everyone. There's good in all of us and I think I simply love people too much, so much that it makes me feel too fucking sad. The sad little, sensitive, unappreciative, Pisces, Jesus man. Why don't you just enjoy it? I don't know!
I don't have a goddess of a wife who sweats ambition and empathy... and a daughter who reminds me too much of what i used to be, full of love and joy, kissing every person she meets because everyone is good and will do her no harm. And that terrifies me to the point to where I can barely function. I can't stand the thought of Frances becoming the miserable, self-destructive, death rocker that I've become.
I have it good, very good, and I'm grateful, but since the age of seven, I've become hateful towards all humans in general. Only because it seems so easy for people to get along that have empathy. Only because I love and feel sorry for people too much I guess.
Thank you all from the pit of my burning, nauseous stomach for your letters and concern during the past years. I'm too much of an erratic, moody baby! I don't have the passion anymore, and so remember, it's better to burn out than to fade away.
Peace, love, empathy.
Kurt Cobain
Speaking from the tongue of an experienced simpleton who obviously would rather be an emasculated, infantile complain-ee. This note should be pretty easy to understand.
All the warnings from the punk rock 101 courses over the years, since my first introduction to the, shall we say, ethics involved with independence and the embracement of your community has proven to be very true. I haven't felt the excitement of listening to as well as creating music along with reading and writing for too many years now. I feel guity beyond words about these things.
For example when we're back stage and the lights go out and the manic roar of the crowds begins., it doesn't affect me the way in which it did for Freddie Mercury, who seemed to love, relish in the the love and adoration from the crowd which is something I totally admire and envy. The fact is, I can't fool you, any one of you. It simply isn't fair to you or me. The worst crime I can think of would be to rip people off by faking it and pretending as if I'm having 100% fun. Sometimes I feel as if I should have a punch-in time clock before I walk out on stage. I've tried everything within my power to appreciate it (and I do,God, believe me I do, but it's not enough). I appreciate the fact that I and we have affected and entertained a lot of people. It must be one of those narcissists who only appreciate things when they're gone. I'm too sensitive. I need to be slightly numb in order to regain the enthusiasms I once had as a child.
On our last 3 tours, I've had a much better appreciation for all the people I've known personally, and as fans of our music, but I still can't get over the frustration, the guilt and empathy I have for everyone. There's good in all of us and I think I simply love people too much, so much that it makes me feel too fucking sad. The sad little, sensitive, unappreciative, Pisces, Jesus man. Why don't you just enjoy it? I don't know!
I don't have a goddess of a wife who sweats ambition and empathy... and a daughter who reminds me too much of what i used to be, full of love and joy, kissing every person she meets because everyone is good and will do her no harm. And that terrifies me to the point to where I can barely function. I can't stand the thought of Frances becoming the miserable, self-destructive, death rocker that I've become.
I have it good, very good, and I'm grateful, but since the age of seven, I've become hateful towards all humans in general. Only because it seems so easy for people to get along that have empathy. Only because I love and feel sorry for people too much I guess.
Thank you all from the pit of my burning, nauseous stomach for your letters and concern during the past years. I'm too much of an erratic, moody baby! I don't have the passion anymore, and so remember, it's better to burn out than to fade away.
Peace, love, empathy.
Kurt Cobain
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Dear Passerby
Dear Passerby,
I've never dedicated a single post to you, though you were the sole reason i started this blog. And in all the mayhem, when I really need good advice, I come to you. The reason you ask!! Well, the people I used to seek advice from, seem to be pretty confused of late. The ones who used to shout out their beliefs from rooftops, seem to be hiding somewhere.
I've sorted out my friends of late - a. those who are a part of my present and from whom I've so much to learn b. those who are a baggage from the past, a baggage i was merely clinging on to, hoping against hope, to meet them someday down the lane.....
And I think I'll leave the baggage behind.
Is it unethical Dear Passerby? Oh forget the morals....is it unwise?
Yours insincerely
Nurav Yednap
..........................................................................................
And maybe someday we'll meet
And maybe laugh and not just speak
Don't buy the promises 'cause
There are no promises I keep
So here i go........
-James Blunt, The Same Mistake
Sunday, October 5, 2008
Friday, October 3, 2008
Hourglass
Francisco d'anconia
Hank Rearden
Howard Roark
John Galt
Varun Pandey
John Galt
Howard Roark
Hank Rearden
Francisco d'anconia
Thursday, October 2, 2008
To Nonesoever It Concerns
If you ever read Virginia Woolf, you'll realize that the only suitable way to write a blog is to follow the stream of consciousness. The only suitable way to write anything at all...... thougths do not condense in a logical manner, why do i have to attend to calls now......
[damn i forgot the PCr snap sessions at 1 p.m.... and the special lunch on Gandhi Jayanti....i forgot to have a bath....how long has it been? take your pick, lunch or bath.... its bapu's birthday..... i guess he'll be more happy to see all his children eat.......]
Just had a discussion with A.C. and A.A. The ol' plan for that mystical mountainous tour props up again, only this time it sounds more plausible, second yearites are meant to do these things.... abhi nahin kiya to bhai kab karoge..... agle saal toh CDC's ***** marenge.
God to Me: I grant you one wish my son. Ask
Me : Make me Howard Roark.
But tell me Mr. Roark what do you think about me
But i do not think about you at all.............
God : (laughs) You already are that. You just need to recognise him within you. Fool you wasted your chance.....
Me : No, realisation dawns....
There are very few people who are so clear about what they want to do in their lives, as I am. And very few so utterly incapable of doing it........ as I am. You know what I need the most; to be kicked in the nuts and laughed upon; I need some sensible person to come and laugh upon me, remind me that of late I have been talking too much and doing too little; I want someone to suspend me from college, send me to the quarries and make me drill stones for twenty hours a day, to slap my face if I do something wrong, but still not teach me how to do it right...... to make me bleed till I realise that the only way to learn is to do it by oneself.........
Its great when you make promises....... like I did to many people over the summer. How can I assure them that those promises were not false. How can I still be so shameless ,to look into their eyes ...... and still feel no shame! If I went and assured them that its alright now, I am back..... the ol' Nurav you knew, would they still believe me....... I pray to God they won't, I hope they'll jeer on me and make me realise what a fool i have been and curse me for having been an obstacle in their progress, that would be fair.......
You know the first thing i'm gonna do as i get out of college..... how would you, you haven't lived me, you have no clue to the number of times i have made a fool of myself..... of how i'll do it one last time again...... and this time xyz will look at me with moist eyes and say- i wish it were true, and i'll throw back my head and laugh the hell, u wish.......
I give you two options, leave everything you know, leave all you know, pack your bags and go into hiding ,where none may trace you to your hurt. Its convenient, they'll never know what hit you. You won't either. The second option........ what was it.
I guess for me there is only one.
You can live a life through a book. You can emulate it too. You can live a life and not learn a thing, you can have a moment in which many a lives are lived. But how would you know, you haven't lived me.......
[damn i forgot the PCr snap sessions at 1 p.m.... and the special lunch on Gandhi Jayanti....i forgot to have a bath....how long has it been? take your pick, lunch or bath.... its bapu's birthday..... i guess he'll be more happy to see all his children eat.......]
Just had a discussion with A.C. and A.A. The ol' plan for that mystical mountainous tour props up again, only this time it sounds more plausible, second yearites are meant to do these things.... abhi nahin kiya to bhai kab karoge..... agle saal toh CDC's ***** marenge.
God to Me: I grant you one wish my son. Ask
Me : Make me Howard Roark.
But tell me Mr. Roark what do you think about me
But i do not think about you at all.............
God : (laughs) You already are that. You just need to recognise him within you. Fool you wasted your chance.....
Me : No, realisation dawns....
There are very few people who are so clear about what they want to do in their lives, as I am. And very few so utterly incapable of doing it........ as I am. You know what I need the most; to be kicked in the nuts and laughed upon; I need some sensible person to come and laugh upon me, remind me that of late I have been talking too much and doing too little; I want someone to suspend me from college, send me to the quarries and make me drill stones for twenty hours a day, to slap my face if I do something wrong, but still not teach me how to do it right...... to make me bleed till I realise that the only way to learn is to do it by oneself.........
Its great when you make promises....... like I did to many people over the summer. How can I assure them that those promises were not false. How can I still be so shameless ,to look into their eyes ...... and still feel no shame! If I went and assured them that its alright now, I am back..... the ol' Nurav you knew, would they still believe me....... I pray to God they won't, I hope they'll jeer on me and make me realise what a fool i have been and curse me for having been an obstacle in their progress, that would be fair.......
You know the first thing i'm gonna do as i get out of college..... how would you, you haven't lived me, you have no clue to the number of times i have made a fool of myself..... of how i'll do it one last time again...... and this time xyz will look at me with moist eyes and say- i wish it were true, and i'll throw back my head and laugh the hell, u wish.......
I give you two options, leave everything you know, leave all you know, pack your bags and go into hiding ,where none may trace you to your hurt. Its convenient, they'll never know what hit you. You won't either. The second option........ what was it.
I guess for me there is only one.
You can live a life through a book. You can emulate it too. You can live a life and not learn a thing, you can have a moment in which many a lives are lived. But how would you know, you haven't lived me.......
Friday, August 22, 2008
If one day could change you
Then it would definitely be this day!
Perhaps we have all discovered by now what the greatest weakness facing man is. If you haven't then you perhaps haven't been thinking much about it. Which again is good in a way 'cause that's what the greatest ill is: Thinking too much .
And thats what i'm going to stop doing from now on. See one small step and i've completely changed my life.
Or so I think.
Perhaps we have all discovered by now what the greatest weakness facing man is. If you haven't then you perhaps haven't been thinking much about it. Which again is good in a way 'cause that's what the greatest ill is: Thinking too much .
And thats what i'm going to stop doing from now on. See one small step and i've completely changed my life.
Or so I think.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
busy doing nothing
I think I've coined this phrase. Well anyone who has come across it before, drop in comment lest I put the trademark sign besides it( the unassuming junta might consider this as a sly attempt to invite comments)
But this is precisely what I've been busy doing all week. Busy doing nothing. A whole lot of ideas barge into my head and then there are hours of discussion and meticulous planning( which calls for further planning ahead). But at the end of the day when my mom asks me what i've been upto i get this sheepish smile on my face, until all that remains of me is that smile, and i reply : well nothing much.....
I've also got this nasty tooth-ache. i attribute it to lack of reading (ya whatever! ). i haven't read a book in ages( read: 20 days). and there is this really smashing James Joyce book on my desk calling out to be read.....almost pleading. I think I'll give in to the temptation......
cheers
Nurav
But this is precisely what I've been busy doing all week. Busy doing nothing. A whole lot of ideas barge into my head and then there are hours of discussion and meticulous planning( which calls for further planning ahead). But at the end of the day when my mom asks me what i've been upto i get this sheepish smile on my face, until all that remains of me is that smile, and i reply : well nothing much.....
I've also got this nasty tooth-ache. i attribute it to lack of reading (ya whatever! ). i haven't read a book in ages( read: 20 days). and there is this really smashing James Joyce book on my desk calling out to be read.....almost pleading. I think I'll give in to the temptation......
cheers
Nurav
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Ideas formed and you see them slip away. Clumsy thoughts you are not committed to. Hours of brainstorming = storm in a cup. We'll study this time around. Oops ! Where my books? Senior to junior, " Yaar class lagale. fayda hota hai". Same senior to his senior, " Pichle ek hafte se insti ka chehra nahin dekha......kuch badla kya".
You know whats different this time around.
None of this is going to happen.
Simple.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
a reason to smile
If a person can commit one act of utter foolishness, he always has the potential to achieve great levels of stupidity.Romance is perfected by falling in love over and over again, the object of affection being of no consequence at all. Similarly, dim-wittedness has to be perfected by performing acts of foolishness over and over again.
I wudn't say this was my first attempt at foolishness. I don't say it is my last.
I once told my friend that if you try to find the rhyme scheme of this poem you'll end up using all twenty six alphabets of the english language( dear friend, you alive ??).This was long back in grade 10th I guess. But such small truths never change.
Go ahead ruin your day.
A REASON TO SMILE
Life seemed to give reasons to lament
Revolving around one painful moment
Of hatred-torn hearts , blood and strife
Sorrow , they say, is the quintessence of life
Then tell me in this sorrowful mile
Is there a reason to smile?
The world is merry with its beautiful seasons
of all the seasons for me there is but one
and it is the dreadful season of sorrow
lying in wait for the bitter 'morrow
my life's shrivelled to a palmsbreadth
and where i walk there are all thorns
but even in your worst nightmare
when your world is all barren and bare
when outside around its blue and gold
and laughter everywhere takes its hold
but in your mind its deep dark night
and in the heart its always twilight
If not for yourself
then just for others
keep that eternal sunshine on your face
and remember that someone, somewhere is happy
'cause you keep smiling.
-- Nurav Yednap
I wudn't say this was my first attempt at foolishness. I don't say it is my last.
I once told my friend that if you try to find the rhyme scheme of this poem you'll end up using all twenty six alphabets of the english language( dear friend, you alive ??).This was long back in grade 10th I guess. But such small truths never change.
Go ahead ruin your day.
A REASON TO SMILE
Life seemed to give reasons to lament
Revolving around one painful moment
Of hatred-torn hearts , blood and strife
Sorrow , they say, is the quintessence of life
Then tell me in this sorrowful mile
Is there a reason to smile?
The world is merry with its beautiful seasons
of all the seasons for me there is but one
and it is the dreadful season of sorrow
lying in wait for the bitter 'morrow
my life's shrivelled to a palmsbreadth
and where i walk there are all thorns
but even in your worst nightmare
when your world is all barren and bare
when outside around its blue and gold
and laughter everywhere takes its hold
but in your mind its deep dark night
and in the heart its always twilight
If not for yourself
then just for others
keep that eternal sunshine on your face
and remember that someone, somewhere is happy
'cause you keep smiling.
-- Nurav Yednap
Saturday, August 16, 2008
And Arpit' s gone crazy
There couldn't have been greater elation on a kids face when he sees a mickey-mouse pic. But arpit sitting right next to me is elated 'cause he's finally made his mark in the complex world of electronic circuits.
His accomplishment?
Getting a 5v regulated supply from a LM7805 voltage regulator.
Not a noble prize winning accomplishment, but try explaining that to this kid.
From mickey-mouse to dear micromouse, we've got a long way to go........but its a heartening start nevertheless.
His accomplishment?
Getting a 5v regulated supply from a LM7805 voltage regulator.
Not a noble prize winning accomplishment, but try explaining that to this kid.
From mickey-mouse to dear micromouse, we've got a long way to go........but its a heartening start nevertheless.
??
why is Preity Zinta so beautiful?
Oops i had to ask this! This question has been troubling me for quite sometime. And i dread this question because i have absolutely no answer to it.
and for those of you who disagree with me, i have one simple advice for ya all:
go to hell
yours
nurav yednap
Oops i had to ask this! This question has been troubling me for quite sometime. And i dread this question because i have absolutely no answer to it.
and for those of you who disagree with me, i have one simple advice for ya all:
go to hell
yours
nurav yednap
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Thoughtless Thoughts
Sometimes knowing more about a person can bring a whole new perspective to your mind. It might not change the way you look at the person, might not change the way you feel about him.
More often than not it starts questioning your viewpoint.
True my viewpoint is always biased. Its not that i don't see others point of view, but sometimes once own view takes up too much of the foreground.
Why am i writing all this. Nn offhand comment can never be too strong to incite such thoughts. It must have been in my mind for sometime now.
Arghh this cold is killing me. I'll think about it later.
More often than not it starts questioning your viewpoint.
True my viewpoint is always biased. Its not that i don't see others point of view, but sometimes once own view takes up too much of the foreground.
Why am i writing all this. Nn offhand comment can never be too strong to incite such thoughts. It must have been in my mind for sometime now.
Arghh this cold is killing me. I'll think about it later.
Friday, August 8, 2008
08/08/08
If I only knew that the most auspicious Chinese day had a funny side to it I would have been better prepared. And when life has got something funny for you up her sleeve( ? her, why not him?) it has the most amazing ways of getting things done.
Like me atending two Repri classes a day.
Two? And upon that Repri?
Hell you must be kidding.
Hell i'm not.
Now for a kid who finds it difficult to attend two classes an entire day, attending two of Repri in a day, is like getting India a gold in the Olympics. But miracles do happen and so here I am on the insistence of my friend attending his section class as well, feeling as dumb as I possibly can.
But the fun does not stop there . Enter tutor of section 5 and i wonder why on earth does he bear an uncanny resemblance to tutor section no. 3.
Which unfortunately is my section.
And its unfortunately the same tutor.
And i've (very) unfortunately attended his class only two hours back.
The fact that he kept looking queerly at me throughout the hour and the fact that I kept answering his questions before they were asked( yeah they repeat the same thing in all their classes) made it infact an embarrassing day.
Anyone to beat that and i'll swap my Repri section with him.
Kidding ofcourse.
Like me atending two Repri classes a day.
Two? And upon that Repri?
Hell you must be kidding.
Hell i'm not.
Now for a kid who finds it difficult to attend two classes an entire day, attending two of Repri in a day, is like getting India a gold in the Olympics. But miracles do happen and so here I am on the insistence of my friend attending his section class as well, feeling as dumb as I possibly can.
But the fun does not stop there . Enter tutor of section 5 and i wonder why on earth does he bear an uncanny resemblance to tutor section no. 3.
Which unfortunately is my section.
And its unfortunately the same tutor.
And i've (very) unfortunately attended his class only two hours back.
The fact that he kept looking queerly at me throughout the hour and the fact that I kept answering his questions before they were asked( yeah they repeat the same thing in all their classes) made it infact an embarrassing day.
Anyone to beat that and i'll swap my Repri section with him.
Kidding ofcourse.
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Random thought
There are few books which have affected me deeply. Infact books have always been a way for me to escape the present, perhaps that’s why I’ve always vouched for fiction . But two books: Angels and Demons by Dan Brown and Living History: Hillary Rodham Clinton’s autobiography have left me moved , to say nothing of the fact that I read them in succession.
Every book cannot be expected to affect everyone in the same manner, a person hopelessly in love would fine a curious joy in reading a mushy romantic which would seem tosh to me; an International Political Guidebook would seem like the Bible to some. And so I would not be surprised if the majority did not share my stand on these books.
I am currently in that state of my life where I’ve begun questioning everything I do. Why do I need the engineering? Why the MBA or the MS? Why do everything that everyone’s doing and millions before me have done? Where have those dreams of greatness and fame that I used to concoct in my childhood gone? Has pragmatism led the way to mediocrity?
And the most troubling of all is my faith, or the lack of it. I seem to have completely lost it. Not that I was very spiritual before, Diwali and my birthday being the only two days I would join my hands before the Lord. But of late I can see that I’ve lost complete belief, even an atheist would be in awe of me. I just can’t bring myself to join hands or say a prayer when there are immense nagging doubts in my mind.
And if anyone in the crowd was in this state he would perhaps understand why the two books have affected me in the way they did. Perhaps now I see what it takes to be different from the crowd. Perhaps now I see that it is OK to not have faith on what you have been taught to believe, that one day it will come to me when I need it most. Perhaps reading these two books has been a watershed moment in my life.
Perhaps, definitely perhaps.
Every book cannot be expected to affect everyone in the same manner, a person hopelessly in love would fine a curious joy in reading a mushy romantic which would seem tosh to me; an International Political Guidebook would seem like the Bible to some. And so I would not be surprised if the majority did not share my stand on these books.
I am currently in that state of my life where I’ve begun questioning everything I do. Why do I need the engineering? Why the MBA or the MS? Why do everything that everyone’s doing and millions before me have done? Where have those dreams of greatness and fame that I used to concoct in my childhood gone? Has pragmatism led the way to mediocrity?
And the most troubling of all is my faith, or the lack of it. I seem to have completely lost it. Not that I was very spiritual before, Diwali and my birthday being the only two days I would join my hands before the Lord. But of late I can see that I’ve lost complete belief, even an atheist would be in awe of me. I just can’t bring myself to join hands or say a prayer when there are immense nagging doubts in my mind.
And if anyone in the crowd was in this state he would perhaps understand why the two books have affected me in the way they did. Perhaps now I see what it takes to be different from the crowd. Perhaps now I see that it is OK to not have faith on what you have been taught to believe, that one day it will come to me when I need it most. Perhaps reading these two books has been a watershed moment in my life.
Perhaps, definitely perhaps.
Monday, July 7, 2008
wimble- ka- don
“Whatever be the result ,one thing is sure; the winner of this years Wimbledon is a name starting with R.”, quipped the commentator. Amazed at the prophecy and then suddenly realizing how pathetic the one liner was I switched off the idiot box. With the excitement for the finals mounting on ,a 35-minute rain delay wasn’t doing anything to ease it.
I have always, on principles, been on the side of the winner. It was obvious then that I had been chanting “Go Roger” all day long. And to say that I have been let down by his defeat would be saying too little.
“Complacence is a crime “ is a motto that has proudly hung on my bedroom door since God knows when, and on Sunday all Roger seemed to say was “Yeah, I’m a criminal”. Wild forehands , tame backhands and a lethargy that would have suited a Sunday afternoon anywhere but Wimbledon. And to see a rabbit-like-Nadal run all over the court
hitting winners from all corners got me thinking if this is really the end of the classy Federer era.
Yes it is and I think we should all go in unision:
Vamos Rafa!!
I have always, on principles, been on the side of the winner. It was obvious then that I had been chanting “Go Roger” all day long. And to say that I have been let down by his defeat would be saying too little.
“Complacence is a crime “ is a motto that has proudly hung on my bedroom door since God knows when, and on Sunday all Roger seemed to say was “Yeah, I’m a criminal”. Wild forehands , tame backhands and a lethargy that would have suited a Sunday afternoon anywhere but Wimbledon. And to see a rabbit-like-Nadal run all over the court
hitting winners from all corners got me thinking if this is really the end of the classy Federer era.
Yes it is and I think we should all go in unision:
Vamos Rafa!!
Sunday, July 6, 2008
I begin
For someone who has had a childhood spent feeding on( and not just reading) Oscar Wilde and his Irish lot, I could be pleasantly forgiven for a rather stiff form of writing . All those years following the witty sarcasms, paradoxes and double entredes have not been lost on me and I will continue to be, for sometime atleast, a spoilt child.
If u ever wonder what makes a person start a blog all you need is a vacation with absolutely nothing to do. It is one of the rarest cases when something comes out of nothing. But let me also attribute it to a fad, seeing a whole lot of my “bitisan” seniors follow the blog path has also got my fingers working overtime.
I would have loved to commence this blog with something more historic, something that would make it sound more iconic on the 5th of this July. But as I have so often noticed, on such occasions, the ever eloquent me, fails to find words.
Not the ultimate mood for starting something new, but as I wade through this lazy month I hope things do get better. Its paralyzing immobility , I remember someone calling it, and I could not agree with that someone more.
Cheers
If u ever wonder what makes a person start a blog all you need is a vacation with absolutely nothing to do. It is one of the rarest cases when something comes out of nothing. But let me also attribute it to a fad, seeing a whole lot of my “bitisan” seniors follow the blog path has also got my fingers working overtime.
I would have loved to commence this blog with something more historic, something that would make it sound more iconic on the 5th of this July. But as I have so often noticed, on such occasions, the ever eloquent me, fails to find words.
Not the ultimate mood for starting something new, but as I wade through this lazy month I hope things do get better. Its paralyzing immobility , I remember someone calling it, and I could not agree with that someone more.
Cheers
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